About Me

Hi everyone! My name is Sarah, and I am a Christian, saved and sustained daily by my wonderful Savior. I am a wife to my high school sweetheart, Mitch; we got married at 19! I am a daughter, a sister, a friend, an aunt, a co-worker, and a woman that struggles with infertility. God has used this struggle to completely transform my life. I have experienced fear, hope, anxiety, compassion, trust, peace, tears, excitement, pain, laughter, and many other things that come with infertility. But most of all, I have a deeper trust and friendship with my Creator and my husband, and for this, I am forever thankful. The purpose of this blog is for me to remember the ups and downs of this trial, and how my Savior has brought me through it all. For those who have never struggled in this area, I hope this blog will help you see a glimpse into the life of someone struggling with infertility, so that you might better know how to encourage them through these difficult times. I also pray that this blog will help other women struggling in this area to know that you are not alone! There is a river of peace that is found in Christ that can help you through even the darkest of circumstances, I promise!

Thursday, February 11, 2016

50/50

Baby,

Once again I sat in a doctors office, pregnant, bleeding and scared. After a very unsure ultrasound, the dr says to us "well, you can come back in a week for another ultrasound, but it's a 50/50 chance on whether the baby will make it"

WHY?!?!?

Why did God give us this pregnancy just to potentially take it away again? I know it will be worth all the pain if we are able to hold you one day, but in the meantime, this just flat out sucks. I literally just got done writing down a whole list of specific prayer requests for this pregnancy, and not seeing blood was one of my first ones. And the very next day there it was, blood.

We've had two ultrasounds at this point, and neither of them had very good news. Although my blood work is still fantastic, so it's very confusing. All I wanted was a smooth pregnancy, but for some reason that's not what God has planned. I'm trying to get to a point where I don't question His ways, but it's times like this where it's very hard.

I've seen His hand in our life in so many ways, so I know His ways are higher than mine. But I'm just praying so hard that two miscarriages are not a part of His plan for us...

I love you so much, and always will, even if I never hold you on this earth.

-mommy

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