About Me

Hi everyone! My name is Sarah, and I am a Christian, saved and sustained daily by my wonderful Savior. I am a wife to my high school sweetheart, Mitch; we got married at 19! I am a daughter, a sister, a friend, an aunt, a co-worker, and a woman that struggles with infertility. God has used this struggle to completely transform my life. I have experienced fear, hope, anxiety, compassion, trust, peace, tears, excitement, pain, laughter, and many other things that come with infertility. But most of all, I have a deeper trust and friendship with my Creator and my husband, and for this, I am forever thankful. The purpose of this blog is for me to remember the ups and downs of this trial, and how my Savior has brought me through it all. For those who have never struggled in this area, I hope this blog will help you see a glimpse into the life of someone struggling with infertility, so that you might better know how to encourage them through these difficult times. I also pray that this blog will help other women struggling in this area to know that you are not alone! There is a river of peace that is found in Christ that can help you through even the darkest of circumstances, I promise!

Monday, July 14, 2014

42

Baby,

Days like this make this whole process that much more difficult. Since we started trying to have you, 42 people have announced their pregnancy. This is the biggest baby boom I've ever seen in my life. I am completely SURROUNDED by pregnancy. It's days like this that make me want to lay in bed all day and cry for myself and for your daddy. It's days like this that I question if God is even listening to my prayers. It's days like this that make me feel like God is answering our prayers on other people. It's days like this that bring me to the end of myself.

It's not that I wish these women weren't pregnant. Its just that I wish there were 43 pregnant women. I wish I was one of them.

I know deep down that God knows the exact number of people that will give birth before me. I know that God knows exactly what my future holds, and why He is prolonging this process. I know that God has a perfect reason for all of my "whys?". But I also know that He doesn't owe me an explanation. He doesn't owe me a baby. He doesn't owe me anything. That's a tough pill to swallow sometimes.

I pray that one day all of this would make sense. That I would be able to look back and understand why all of this is happening. But I also pray that if it never makes sense, that I would still praise God through it all.

-mommy

No comments:

Post a Comment